Recently, Kam and I were talking with a certain family member who shall remain nameless, about the possibility of finally proposing to his girlfriend.  And after a little banter about buying rings and photography and such, we were surprised by an explosion of “OMG I’m just dreading planning the wedding!”

I have to admit that Kam and I do not have the typical wedding planning experience.  With our wedding, we were so focused on the challenge of getting travel visas for our out-of-country family members that everything else felt small in comparison.  If our families could actually be together in the same country, the same room, for the first time, details like our centerpieces would work themselves out.

But we’ve noticed that there are a few things that our couples and friends have in common that help keep them focused on enjoying their wedding day and even enjoying the wedding planning period.  After all, you are beginning your marriage, it should be fun.

1.  Hire a planner, or at least a day-of coordinator

As much as you might want to handle all of your pinterest DIY projects yourself, it is easy to get overwhelmed.  On your wedding day, especially, having a professional who can handle details like meeting vendors, setting up rooms, and putting out fires means that you and your family and friends can relax and enjoy the day.  And really, the whole point is to enjoy the magic of the day.

2.  Be Prepared to Make Decisions – i.e. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

I think a lot of the stress from wedding planning comes from having too many options and not being able to make decisions.  One of the advantages of planning a wedding in a short period of time and in a difference city was that we just had to make decisions.  There wasn’t time to hem and haw, to go back and forth on florists and photographers and cakes and caterers.  If we liked it, we booked it.  And that’s the best advice I can give you – if you find a florist you love, go for it.  When you click with a photographer, just book them.  Trust your gut and your heart and the whole experience will be more enjoyable.

3.  Remember, You Can’t Please Everybody

There’s no denying that wedding planning is a family affair.  Everybody, including your mom, your fiance’s mom, aunts, cousins, friends, and bridesmaids, will have opinions on what you wear, how much you spend, and every single decision you have to make.  Trust me, this makes #2 that much harder to do!  But seriously, you cannot make everybody happy.  I’m not encouraging you to go all bridezilla, but in the end, it’s your day.  It is possible to create a wedding that is wonderful and meaningful for your guests as well as perfect for you.

4.  Discuss Your Budget, but Have Some Flexibility

Ok, here’s a tough one.  The budget question.  First of all, your wedding budget may be one of the first times that you work with your soon-to-be spouse on a budget, and that’s a big deal.  But no matter how many articles you read, most couples are somewhat surprised about how much weddings cost.  Especially if you’re in a major metropolitan area like Chicago, national averages may not be average for where you are.  So know what’s important to you, and be ready to talk and adjust as you go.

5.  Take Time Off From Planning

This is a good habit to start now and maintain after you’re married.  Plan date nights.  Take time to just be together and have fun, and not talk about wedding details.  Keep doing the fun things that made you fall in love with each other.  Keep reminding yourselves about why you love each other.  And really, don’t stop after you’re married.

Ann & Kam PHOTOGRAPH WEDDINGS and More in Chicago and beyond.  Visit our website and contact us to create fabulous photos for your event.

 So tell me, what’s got you most stressed out about wedding planning?  Don’t be shy, leave a comment!